Put Your Big Girl/ Big Boy Pants ON
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Author Hope
Put Your Big Girl/Big Boy Pants On

There’s a beast that lives inside of a CH suffers brain. A beast that will take away all we have to live for if we let it. A pain so severe many of us would rather die than be alive. We don’t understand why we have this condition. For me I also suffer from a pituitary adenoma deep in my brain and constantly wonder which beast is going to show their ugly face today.
Just like any other medical illness, I could let CH and PA run my life and at my times they do and CH normally wins, but I can’t let it. I have to push through the pain as much as I can and put my big girl pants on and still live in society. Although at times I like you, would rather die than be alive I know that I will not be the one to make that decision therefore I deal with the pain.

As I stare at this computer, yes I do see the tiny flashes of light dance across the vision in my right eye at least a few times a minute. Yes I do have the aching pain on the right side of my skull and an itching sensation. Yes, I do have nausea and do have a trash can to my side and yes I know that although Mr. CH will show his ugly face in my brain at any given moment I have to push through the pain and still be productive for the day.

I know his pain is so severe for some of you. Chances are you’re not going to do die. Although I know you probably feel like you’re going to. Instead of lying on the couch all day or buried in a room full of darkness, get off the couch. Get moving. Try doing something you enjoy. It will help you forget about the pain. Push through the pain. The more you push through the pain, the easier it will be to eliminate the pain and start living a semi normal life. So what if you have to drag the trash can with you or take your oxygen with you. The point is you’re putting on your big girl/big boy pants and telling CH to bring it. Your stronger then CH and although CH will not leave your brain you are learning to cope just like it took me 2 ½ years to do.

We are in this fight together and regardless of your illness whether it is CH, a PA, or whatever other sickly illness decides to hold your body hostage, we as humans on this earth only have one life to live. Why not make it a mission to push through the pain of today and live life to the fullest until you wake up again and start all over again tomorrow.
Good luck everyone and I pray for a PF day for you.


my age

Diagnosis: my diagnosis
Cluster Headaches

date clusters started
Spring 2011

background - family, location, career, etc.
Clusters started: your story

Date Event
Jan 2003 sample event


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